Thanksgiving this or that questions are quick two-option picks, like "Pie crust or pie filling?", that get kids ages 5 to 9 talking at the holiday table. A kid picks one, explains why, and the table has a conversation instead of a wait.
A Thanksgiving table has a lot going on: 12 conversations at once, a turkey that is running late, and a 6-year-old who has been told to sit still for longer than any 6-year-old can. This or that is the fastest way to give that kid something to do with their voice besides asking when dessert is.
These 75 Thanksgiving this or that questions are written for kids ages 5 to 9. Each one is two options and a pick. No setup, no rules to explain, nothing to think about for too long. A 5-year-old can answer in a second, and a 9-year-old will want to tell you why.
They are sorted into eight categories, from the plate and the pie to the parade, the drive and the slow day after.
How to Play
Read two options, everyone picks one, and someone asks why.
Ask one to three questions per sitting: one to kick the conversation off, one in the middle, one for the last bite if the table is still talking. Pick the slot, ask the question, then move on. Five in a row is a quiz, not a conversation.
Ask it to the whole table. This or that works best when the grown-ups pick too, because the fun is in finding out that Grandpa is a dark meat person and an aunt would trade the turkey for an extra roll. Relatives who do not see the kids often get an easy way in.
Ask the follow-up. After the first pick, follow with "Why that one?", "What would happen next?", or "Tell me more about that." The first answer is usually the draft. The second answer is the real one.
If a kid wants both, or neither, let them say so. That is an answer too.
TRY THIS
Make it a round. Read the pair, everyone points on the count of three, and the smaller side explains their pick first.
1. The Thanksgiving Plate
Start with the food, because every kid at the table already has an opinion about it.
1. White meat or dark meat?
2. Turkey leg or turkey slices?
3. Mashed potatoes or sweet potatoes?
4. Stuffing or mac and cheese?
5. Rolls or cornbread?
6. Green beans or corn?
7. Cranberry sauce from a can or homemade cranberry sauce?
8. Gravy on the potatoes or gravy on the turkey?
9. Marshmallows on the sweet potatoes or no marshmallows?
10. Every food touching on the plate or every food in its own spot?
2. Pie and Dessert
These fit the stretch between clearing the plates and cutting the pie, which always feels longer than it is.
11. Pecan pie or cherry pie?
12. A big slice of one pie or a tiny slice of every pie?
13. Pie crust or pie filling?
14. Warm pie or cold pie?
15. Pumpkin bread or pumpkin muffins?
16. Brownies or cookies on the dessert table?
17. Making the pie or eating the pie?
18. Dessert right after dinner or dessert after a walk?
19. Licking the spoon or licking the bowl?
3. Leftovers and the Day After
Thanksgiving does not end at dinner. These work on Friday morning, when the fridge is full and nobody has anywhere to be.
20. Leftover pie or leftover stuffing?
21. Leftovers cold from the fridge or warmed up?
22. A turkey sandwich with cranberry sauce or without?
23. Leftovers for lunch or leftovers for dinner?
24. Friday in pajamas or Friday at the park?
25. Sleeping in on Friday or getting up early?
26. Putting up winter decorations or keeping the fall ones a little longer?
27. A movie on Friday night or a game night?
28. Turkey soup or turkey pot pie?
4. Family and the Table
These are about the people, not the food. They work best once everyone has sat down and found their seat.
29. Sitting next to a cousin or sitting next to a grandparent?
30. Setting the table or clearing the table?
31. Taking turns talking or everyone talking at once?
32. Cloth napkins or paper napkins?
33. Name cards at every seat or sit wherever you want?
34. Family photo before dinner or after dinner?
35. Family stories or family games after dinner?
36. Helping in the kitchen or greeting guests at the door?
37. A small Thanksgiving or a big Thanksgiving?
38. The same seat every year or a new seat every year?
WORTH KNOWING
Some younger kids pick whichever option they heard last. If a 5-year-old always picks the second one, swap the order and ask again.
5. Thankful Picks
Asking a kid what they are thankful for often gets a shrug. Giving them two good things to choose between gets an answer, and usually a reason.
39. A thank you note or a thank you hug?
40. Saying what you are thankful for out loud or writing it on a card?
41. Thankful for something big or something small?
42. Thanking a teacher or thanking a coach?
43. A thankful jar or a thankful tree?
44. Giving a gift or getting a gift?
45. Helping a neighbor or helping at home?
46. Bringing a neighbor some pie or raking a neighbor's leaves?
47. A thank you you say or a thank you you do?
6. Fall and Harvest
Thanksgiving sits at the end of fall. These questions use the season as a way in, and they work just as well on the drive there.
48. Corn on the cob or popcorn?
49. Orange leaves or red leaves?
50. Sweater weather or snow weather?
51. Carving a pumpkin or painting a pumpkin?
52. A scarecrow or a snowman?
53. A rainy fall day or a windy fall day?
54. Acorns or pinecones?
55. Mittens or gloves?
56. Soup in a bowl or soup in a bread bowl?
7. The Parade, the Game and the Long Weekend
For the morning in front of the TV, the backyard after lunch and the car ride home.
57. Watching the parade or watching the dog show?
58. The giant balloons or the marching bands?
59. Watching football or playing football in the yard?
60. A car ride or a plane ride to see family?
61. Road trip snacks or road trip games?
62. Sleeping over at a relative's house or sleeping in your own bed?
63. Tag in the backyard or hide and seek in the house?
64. Staying up late or getting up early for the parade?
65. The window seat or the middle seat in the car?
8. Silly Thanksgiving
For when the table needs a laugh. Ask these with a straight face.
66. A turkey in sneakers or a turkey in a tuxedo?
67. A mashed potato snowman or a gravy volcano?
68. A pie as tall as you or a roll as big as a pillow?
69. A turkey that does cartwheels or a pumpkin that rolls itself to the table?
70. Wearing a pie tin as a hat or a napkin as a cape?
71. Eating dinner standing on one foot or eating it with your eyes closed?
72. A parade balloon of your face or of your pet?
73. Cranberry sauce shaped like a heart or shaped like a dinosaur?
74. Talking like a turkey or walking like a turkey for the whole dinner?
75. A pie for a pillow or a turkey for a teddy bear?
Keep the Conversation Going After the Holiday
A good this or that question gets a kid talking because the choice is easy and the reason is not. That works on a Tuesday in March just as well as it does on Thanksgiving. The holiday is a good time to notice how much a kid will say when someone asks the right question and waits for the answer.
Tell Me Cards is a deck of 107 open-ended conversation cards for kids ages 5 to 9, built on child psychology research. Pull one card at dinner, in the car or at bedtime, and the question is already chosen.
For this or that questions all year, see 300 This or That Questions for Kids (Ages 5 to 9). For more food picks, see 100 This or That Food Questions for Kids (Ages 5 to 9). For questions that take a little longer to answer, see 75 Thanksgiving Would You Rather Questions for Kids (Ages 5 to 9).
Frequently Asked Questions
What are good Thanksgiving this or that questions for kids?
Good ones are two things a young kid already knows, like "White meat or dark meat?" or "Pie crust or pie filling?" Food, family, thankful picks, fall and silly turkey questions all work. The 75 questions above are sorted by category so you can pick by moment.
How do you play this or that at Thanksgiving?
Read two options, everyone picks one, and someone asks "Why that one?" Ask one to three questions during the meal: one to start, one in the middle and one for the last bite. Grown-ups pick too.
What is the difference between this or that and would you rather?
This or that is a quick pick between two things. Would you rather adds a situation to imagine, which takes longer to answer. This or that is easier for 5-year-olds and for a busy table, and would you rather tends to get longer answers from kids closer to 9.
Are these questions okay for a 5-year-old?
Yes. Every option is something a 5-year-old can picture, like pie, leaves, cousins and parades. For the youngest kids, start with sections 1, 2 and 8.